Sunny day.

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“Happiness isn’t something that depends on our surroundings.. it’s something we create within ourselves.”

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Another simple, quick sketch from me.

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What am I doing it for?

It’s still raining. Really? Does anyone know a sundance or something? I know I get anoying complaining about the weather, especially when I publicly announced my try on possitive attitude, but I didn’t think the weather was going to seriously test me.

What I wanted to talk about is this, I started going to the gym( working out in public.. also pushing myself there), but what I want to say is not exactly about working out.

I want to gain weight… yes, I am one of those people. When I hit puberty I also got a slight hormonal imbalance…the point is, I was skinny as a stick figure. In the last two years it got better and I managed to gain a little weight, but I could still use some more. This was often an insecurity of mine. Being told I was to skinny by people who I considered friends and who were supposed to know better. Growing up, all the girls around me started getting curves and of course all of the boy’s attention and I didn’t get neither the curves or the attention. Yes, I know, it seems silly now, but back then it didn’t. A snarky remark made by my friend that “only dogs p.lay with bones and real man like meat”.. all those things make a mark somewhere.

So yes, I liked to think that I was working out and trying to gain weight just for me, because I do believe that if you feel good about yourself, you are going to look good and the other way around, but thinking back at this made me realise that maybe I wasn’t doing it just for me. An insecure part of me is surely just looking for approval from other people, wants to be “sexy” for other people. We allready astablished that everyone in the media is trying to tell us what we should look like and it doesn’t feel good either when people start telling you to your face.I think acknowledging that you want to change something in your appearence to appeal to others, you take some of the power back, if that makes sence. Today, I am not sick, I eat more than enough and I am comfortable with my body, but I see that I can improve it so I can feel even more comfortable with it. I will keep working on myself until I am happy with myself and if other people are happy, that’s great and if not, that’s fine with me. I will acknowledge that comments about my appearence have an effect on me and work on that, because at the end of the day, I am doing it for me.

Liebster award

A few days ago I got nominated for the Liebster award by  THECRUMBSOFMYLIFE ( Thank you for the nomination).

Although I am honored, I must admit that I would usually shy away from participating in such things. But, since I pledget to be open and positive to new things, here we go. Basically, I nominate some other people, answer some questions and get to “torture” the ones I nominated with my questions *evil laugh* ( if they choose to participate, that is ).

Here are the official rules :

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And the questions :

  1. If you were a sandwich, what kind would you be and why?
  2. Something with pickles, mainly because I like them. It’s not the sexiest vegetable, but who cares.

  3. What is your favorite color and what do you own that is that color?
  4. I guess I should say black since my open closet looks like a black hole.

  5. You have to give a TedX presentation – what is your topic?
  6. That’s a hard one.. you can already find a TedX on mostly anything. I guess it would be on how to achieve something worthy of a TedTalk.

  7. What was your best vacation ever?
  8. Going to the sea alone with my older sister in eight grade, because I always secretly thought she was cool and I was glade whenever I could spend time with her. Also no one tell her that because I won’t hear the end of it.

  9. What is the best present you have ever received?
  10. I am not much of a present person. It’s not exactly a present, but I would say the little sacrifices I saw my parents make over the years to make my life easier.

  11. If you found an unmarked suitcase with $1 million in it – what would you do?
  12. I watch too many movies so I would probably asume that someone will come after me if I take it. I guess I would invest.. nah, I would go to Hawaii.

  13. If you could invite any 5 people – living or dead – to a dinner party, who do you invite?
  14. Matt Damon, Johnny Depp, Leonardo da Vinci, Kevin Hart and Whoopi Goldberg.

  15. If you knew today would be your last, where would you want to be?
  16. As I said.. Hawaii. Just give me a beach and a cocktail, really.

  17. What is your favorite board and/or card game?
  18. I don’t have one, what I do have is a temper. Enough said.

  19. What is the first piece of advice you would give to your 20-year-old self?
  20. Try not embarras yourself in public as often as you do, also stay consistent with the things you set to do in your mind, also take your own advice.

  21. At what age did you first fall in Love?
  22. I guess I was about five. It wasn’t love love but I just liked to torture that one boy in kindergarten.

My nominees:

Sarah Magnolia

Kesiliha

Marcelle Davis

James Fielden

Sweet aroma

Her story

Mind and life matters

Thank God For My Life

Confessions of a readholic

A Girl’s Path To Happiness

TO ZEN TO PARTY

If you choose to participate, here are my questions (and don’t wory, I’m not grading them xD) :

  1. What is your guilty pleasure song ?
  2. If you could have a superpower, what would it be ?
  3. What is your earliest childhood memory ?
  4. If you could send a short message to aliens, what would it be ?
  5. What is the most important thing you learned from your parents?
  6. Do you enjoy the winter time, or are you just about turning into the grinch?
  7. Is someone told you that you would be remembered for thousands of years to come, what would you like to be remembered for?
  8. Do you ever silently judge strangers on the street ?
  9. Ketchup or Mayo ?
  10. What is your favourite part about blogging ?
  11. When was the last time you starred up at the stars?

Also feel free to answer if you are not nominated.

Rainy day blues

” I still have a photo on my wall of the greatest idol I will ever have in my life, and it’s myself at eight. Because that’s when the forces of imagination have the same value as the real world, when they’re an instrument of survival: when my mother disappeared, and I imagined a mother. That was me at my best. ” – Henning Mankell

Henning Mankel was a Swedish crime writer who passed this weekd. Actually, I didn’t know about his work until now, but I ame accros this quote and loved it instantly.
There was once an eight year old girl who wanted to be a surgeon and a teacher and a painter and a dancer. She loved superheroes and wanted to save the world. She believed in magic and that she could become anything she wanted. On days like today, when it’s raining the whole animal kingdom, and it’s hard to make myself get out bed, when I lose motivation and doubt myself, I think back of her. People say “before you give up think about who’s watching”, usually about their children, but what if that child watching was your eight year old self. Maybe we shouldn’t lose the childish hope that the world can only get better and that we can make it that way. Can you still imagine a reality for yourself and believe you can achieve anything? If your eight year old self be proud of you?

The beauty of autumn

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I saw this beautiful quote and I thought I should share it.

The thing is, I strongly dislike the winter. I’m not going to say hate.. actually I am going to say that. Fall therefore, is just an intro for the winter. I don’t like being cold, and where I live, no matter how many layers of clothing I wear I am still cold. The sun is out for about an hour a day and everything is muddy… I’m exaggerating but you get the picture. And don’t even get me started on capitalized consumerist holidays. So yes, I am practically the grinch, you can go on and hate me.
Despite all that, you can’t deny that nature in autumn turns into an awe inspiring work of art. It shows us the beauty of destruction, tearing down what no longer serves and growing again in the beginning of a new season.

In the name of keeping a positive outlook and not letting the weather influence my emotions, I decided to go out and snap some photos. As you may see, I am not a pro in photography.

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Iner nacissist let loose

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Endings

The future.. Is it weird that every time someone mentions the future I think of Future the rapper. I can’t decide if rap music ruined me or saved me.

I’m going of track again. Anyway, two months ago when I started my blog, I had no idea if I had something to say and if there even was anyone willing to listen (read). I joined writing101 to get me stared and today I couldn’t be happier about it. I found out that daily prompts are a great way to get your imagination going, but more importantly, I learned that if you are brave enough to share your story there are people who will listen.

So thanks to everyone who participated in writing101 and everyone who didn’t, but read something on my blog or even reached out, it means a lot.

I am not one to make plans, but if I can take anything away from this, it’s that sticking to a schedule can be very rewarding. I don’t know what the future holds but for the first time in a while I can say that I have a vision and I am looking forward to creating and sharing it.

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Also I was just looking for a feature image so i googled ‘future’ and this came out. I am not the only one!
Ok, bye.

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Vegetarian roundup

Today is World vegetarian day (I just found out, but I’m going to act all smart), so I decided to make a little different post today- a roundup of a few vegetarian and vegan recepies I found on various blogs.
I am a vegetarian for, I guess, a year an a half now, but I often eat vegan. I can say that I absolutely enjoy the lifestyle so far and I am open to talk about it and it’s benefits, however, I am not trying to push it on anybody or argue about it.
I just want to thank all of the food bloggers out there in the name of all culinary failures, like me, because without you I would be stranded eating peanut butter sanwiches for every meal.
Here we go:

PEANUT BUTTER CUP SMOOTHIE

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However, I could eat peanut butter for every meal if I had to. Let’s start with a smoothie, perfect if you’re working out.

VEGETABLE ROLLS

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Another healthy dish. Also it looks so fresh and colorful… perfect for Instagram.

VEGGIE BURGER

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Abandoning the healthy trend already (story of my life). Veggie burgers are a classic and turns out kind of easy to make (seriously.. if I can do it).

EGGPLANT NUGGETS

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Eggplant is one of my favourites and you can make it a lot of different ways. This is actually a new one I found and I’ll have to try it out soon.

LASAGNA

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Also one of my favourites.. although my mom is probably sick of it.

BROWNIES

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Something sweet at the end.

All of the photographs, of course, belong to the blog owners.